Tuesday, January 31, 2006

two [submodules] down!

ofcourse, dahil masinsinang pagbabasa ang naganap last weekend, may mga bago tayong literature work diba...


let's start with my favorite.

Funny I'm not feeling low.
Today I don't even feel like shouting.
Instead there's just bliss;
My morning is as magnificent as Monalisa's smile.

This is really unexpected.
But I'm glad, I really do.
What made me feel this way,
What filled the emptiness?

I guess things have their own ending;
Next to pain is healing;
So I've turned a new page and
Decided to grow elsewhere
With those who truly cares
And those who really feel.

mga nonsense...................

Love songs are so nice to hear
Become nicer as they enter the heart.
The calming effect they have in our souls;
Even stormy nights stop just to listen;
And Valentine's won't be the same without them.

The stories they tell are overwhelming
The rhythm and blues blend so well
the lines were written perfectly
They make everyone sing, smile, cry.

There's just one thing I wish they won't do
Their power to bring happy memories
Bring back a lot of the opposite too
That is our songs that died long ago.

isa pa, a different story naman.....................

Forever is in our hands now
Not a single chance we'll have to let go
our bond is as strong as indefinite
You and I are one till clock stops turning
And the river stops running.
Do you hear my insides
The cheers and yeahs they sing
Feel the joy filling me today
And plunge in my overwhelming love for you
Drown me as well with what you have.

Talon, sayaw kanta
Ilan lang sa mga nais kong bigkasin
Puso'y taranta at tulala
Di mo lang alam dulot mong kaligayahan
Kailan pa ba ito nadama
Bakit ngayon lamang dumating
Mistulang balisawsaw na sa paghihintay
Isip gulung-gulo kung ika'y asan na.
Pero ngayong hawak kamay na

Wala ng mga tanong sa isip
Hangga't andito sa aking tabi
Wala ng pangngambahan pa
Imbis ay magmamahal ng lubos.

meron pa........................................................

I dreamt last night
I was crying on my bed
Lamp's out, fear filled the room
I heard whispers, buzzes
No, not in my ears but in my mind
Then I got up gingerly
Faced the mirror and wiped up my tears
And stared.
Then everything spun around
Blackness flashed.
In my dream there's someone else
It's not moving though
It's just waiting, lurking in the dark.
I'm not sure what it meant
Why is he there
But when I woke up
I feel nothing but coldness.

Friday, January 27, 2006

happy birthday Nanay!

ang tanda na ni Nanay...

ako rin pala. hehehe, soon I won't receive any gifts from my lolas na. tsk tsk tsk

SELF CHECK: Who am I right now

I am the pool's current head who had no idea what I got myself into until now;
An ACMOD3 crammer, having an information overload about REA and database;
A slave of wireless technology worsened by Globe's unlimited text service;
The stupid, pathetic girl who happens to be crazy about Denver;
The mass behind a mountain-pile of photocopies on Isabel's study table;
Len's correspondent in wacky exchanges while Crazy Kris's avid reader;
Hates pressures but allows them to take over these days;
Self-acclaimed disciplined person who's always in cotrol but the OPPOSITE right now;
Dislikes wasting her time yet have wasted another hour writing this;
A retainers-wearing nerd who tries to fill her social life amid the demands of her program;
A hopeless, trying hard poet who doesn't know how to end this.

Monday, January 23, 2006

l0st and wasted

--name game--

Vain attempt to keep you
I'm hopeless now
Come back please
Tarnish the emptiness
Oh, my love
Raise me up from this sack
Instill the life forgone
And seal my lips with a kiss.

Mangmang ka ba?
Are you that numb
Right here, crippled
Is what remains of me
Existence clinging at the ege of the world.

Distant look in your eyes kills
Oppresses me big time
Mister Kupido, bakit ka ganyan?
Isn't this too much already
Not what you have planned?
I won't hold on anymore.

story behind: as usual, bored with the ACMOD3C, Erik and I came up with this challenge: make a poem spelling your name vertically. Ha! Look what we had, it's lame I know, but atleast, I made one.

--day off movie of the year--

mixed emotions make one vulnerable
you see
i don't watch star cinema movies
not even on tv specials
and not at all on silver screens
no way.

I admire Juday's talents
but won't care how Piolo's nose protrude amazingly
though those won't entice me to see still
a star cinema movie ever
no way.

but where was i last january 8?
what did i do and why wasn't i able to read
the five part story of ACMOD3C?
yes, i summoned in karen's will!
Len's powerful thumbs!
and Golda's charming locks!

I went to see...(uh-oh, i'm dead)
Don't Give Up on Us
I endured the jam-packed corridors,
sat on unsanitized stairs,
accepted my fate and the eye-straining proximity from the screen
not to mention tolerated the muscle stiffling posture we had.

I still don't get it why this movie's a big hit
but i do know why I did go and see it anyway
because my cat just left,
my turtle hasn't arrived yet,
and my dinosaur is as numb as forever.


wondering what is this feeling
why am i so distracted with your absence
it's like i even know your name
yet i feel so restless since you walked away.

you came when i least imagined it
and went as i have expected
but why am i attached
clueless, i don't know
what am i supposed to feel

lips kept asking and asking
is this love or what
my reply was obvious
that can't be possible
how could it be when wenever really met
and you're not ven my type

and so it kept me wondering
what are these butterflies in my stomach
why are my knees shaking so much
just thinking of how you are.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

from thE bottom of my brokEn hEart

I'd let go of what I thought I owned.

It hurts, yes... A LOT actually.

But getting through each day made me realize
that the world will just keep on turning
and I have to continue breathing even if he's not around.

So i got to move on,

face the world after he ruined it,

and prove that that I can be better than what he used to have in me.

source: 09062307907 Nokia 3310

Tuesday, January 17, 2006


Good night

Whoa, it's been a long journey
I've finally reached my senses
Tiring,yes, nevertheless enthralling
There's a lot I've found
And so much to ponder.

Blazing days and cold nights
I can never explain
How I came up here
Battles and turmoils, I've gone
And a hand of roller-coaster ride.

Never felt any
It's all new and exciting, oh yes
I'd say there are regrets
But how could one grow better
If fear will always takeover.

And now I'm ready to go
Rest, replenish what's lost
As time will heal itself
So as the future
Will prepare the next.


Negative Emotions

I feel so dumb
I feel so empty
I hate myself
I hate what's everything with me
I wish this will end
I wish I'm numb
I can't stop myself
I can't breath anymore
I don't want all these
I don't want to cry either
I think I'll have a heart attack
I think Imy knees will give in now.


Lamig ng Gabi

Para akong binuhusan ng malamig na tubig
Parang tinusok ang pusong bigo
Bakit ko nga ba nagawa?
Ano nga bang iniisip ko?

Sadyang masakit tanggapin ang katotohanan
Ngunit bakit ba sadyang kay hirap sabihan ng mga puso
Tanga nga ba o rebelde
Tingnan mo ngayon: sinong nahihirapan?

Thursday, January 12, 2006

sound tRip

Travelling a familiar road would be unnerving without the company of your sound system. True?

Not totally. I've gone on the roads of the Laguna-to-Quezon route for a number of times now but the scenes still awe me; yeah it's familiar but they still look stunning to me, even without a system.

So what am I trying to say?

My point is that music has the ability to distract you from what you actually see and take you far to the depths of imaginations. Layo no?

Last Christmas break, while I'm stucked inside Paj tarnishing the car seat with a butt-mark and observing how woodwashed the old houses are now since I last saw them, the noisy and very bakya Love radio distracted me from my annual paint-analysis and before I knew it, I've already made a story, a sad story, out of the songs I heard.

It all started when I first saw you.
I think I’ve finally found
the one that I’ve been looking for.
I knew that it was you
as soon as you walked thru that door
No, I didn’t know what to say,
just one smile you brightened up my day.
And now all I really want to do today is
I wanna get close to you ( I wanna get close)
cause I couldn’t take my eyes off you (can we get close).
Oooh baby, I’m blinded by you (everyone knows) everyone knows,
and it shows I wanna get close.

As days went by
Bawat araw sinusundan
'Di ka naman tumitingin
Ano'ng aking dapat gawin
Kailan (kailan), kailan mo ba mapapansin ang aking lihim
Kahit ano'ng aking gawin, 'di mo pinapansin
Kailan (kailan), kailan hahaplusin ang pusong bitin na bitin
Kahit ano'ng gawing lambing, 'di mo pa rin pansin

But you still won't notice me
Ninais kong mapalapit sayo, ninais kong malaman mo.
Ang mga paghihirap ko balewala lang sa'yo.

You happened and I got obssessed
And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
When sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am.

Even went crazy
I see you through the smoky air
Can't you feel the weight of my stare
You're so close but still a world away
What i'm dying to say is that
I'm crazy for you
Touch me once and you'll know it's true
I've never wanted anyone like this
It's all brand new
You'll feel it in my kiss
I'm crazy for you
Crazy for you.

Deeper and deeper I've gone
Because I fall so deep
You never know how far I go
And I know why hearts beat desperately
I fall so deep.

Your presence almost drowned me
He's a brick and
I'm drowning slowly off the coast and
I'm headed nowhere.

Then strange things happened
Self-denial is a game
Its strange i never would've
wanted if until there was you.
Because i have learned that love is beyond
what human can imagine,
the more it clears the more i have to let you go.
But now i don't understand why im feeling
so bad now when i know it was my idea.

And slowly everything went blue
It's all because of you, I'm feeling sad and blue
You went away, now my life is just a rainy day
And I love you so, how much you'll never know
You've gone away and left me lonely
Untouchable memories, seem to keep haunting me
Another love so true
That once turned all my gray skies blue
But you disappeared
Now my eyes are filled with tears
And I'm wishing you were here with me

We started to drift apart
Kahit anong mangyari
pag-ibig ko'y sayo parin
at kahit ano pa
ang sabihin nila'y di magbabago
o mahal, maghihintay ako kahit kailan
kahit na umabot man ako'y na sa langit na
at kung di ka mkita, makikiusap kay athala
na ika'y hanapin...

But I won't give up
Pagkat sa isang taong mahal mo ng buong puso
lahat ay gagawin makita kang muli

Instead I let go.
But now I feel lost, don't know what to do
Each and every day I think of you
Holdin' back the tears, I'm trying with all my might
Because you've gone and left me standing All alone
And I know I've got to face tomorrow On my own....
But baby....
Before I let you go
I want to say I love you
I hope that you're listenin' 'Coz it'strue,baby
You'll be forever in my heart
And I know that no one else will do,
yeah So before I let you go
I want to say it..... I love you.

The end.

aaaaawwwwwww.... isn't this romantic? hahaahahaaa.... la lang.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

going nuts with reading

why is it that whenever I'm all into reading my ACMOD3C , this is when my creative juices flow in? it's not that i'm bored with the subject, am i? (~~,)

The BIG-Bang Approach

I've just realized: yeah I was really fast.
But why won't I if time is of the essence
and uncertainty is just a part of the game.
I don't have all the year for slow moves--
one month and i'll still bear a snail mail?
The passion is burning, wouldn't want
to waste the overwhelming desire to be expressive, honest.
And what's the use of going in circles
when the apple's straight away.
Yeah I was too fast, but was that something destructive?

For God's sake, we're in the 21st century now.
Everything happens in a blink of an eye!
And where's the fun there
if you will have to wait for 10 full moons before you strike again?
If you know what you're doing and you know what you want
why wait? after all you'll still do it anyway.
Honestly, what are you going to wait for, eh? For the right time?
That's ridiculous. Who knows when is the right time?
It's the lamest excuse I've ever heard just to delay things
There's no such, trust me.
Yeah I was too fast, but we are still both alive, aren't we?

I was too fast, I know. And look at us? At me? Weren't we happy afterall?

what I learned today

inspired by our lesson today on Systems Planning, I came up with the following statements.

DOMINI Vision Statement

At the age of 20, armed with a laptop and calculator
I will be an associate auditor in a shining business suit
Competent and determined to wreak havoc in the corporate world.
I will also be a full blown tourist by then having stepped on Luzon, Visayas and Mindanao.
And as a proof, my collection of souvenir shirts will be cabinet-full in size.

By 28, when I have my own Makati-flat and a million dollar account
I will tie the knot with whomever I'm around with
I won't care if his parents will like me as long as his initials are RDC
And that he's as cute and as eligible as me.

Sooner or later, if my career will allow
I will be going to a mommies' day out, bumping with my also-bloated pals
And may also be considering the partnership I'll form with my best buddies:
the KFC-everyday, Modular program Survivors, Ltd.

Fast forward: I will retire young and RICH, happy and contented.

DOMINI Mission Statement

I haven't known my purpose in this world yet
But I feel that the following are my true calling.

(in no particular order)

1. To give justice to all the dark schemes of our Scouting Movement head during my GSP days.
2. To uphold the WORK ETHICS I've learned in the very fast paced ACMOD2C - Auditing Theory.
3. To bring difference in the dirty, dishonest and selfish business world.
4. To devote myself on life-fulfilling activities I dreamt of doing since my innocent days.
5. To impart the overwhelming knowledge I have by entering an educational institution.
6. To continue loving my folks, lead my party animals to good life and keep my family ties strong and healthy.

That's it for now. I'm still on my way discovering why am I here for.

reviewing ACMOD3C

mahirap mag-aral ng isang subject na purely technical;
mahirap magbasa ng libro na ang laman ay puro database, ad hoc queries, REA... ano ba tong mga ituu?
mahirap pilitin ang sariling sumubsob sa pag-aaral kung katabi mo ang cellphone mo.
mahirap talaga ang ACMOD3C.

waaaahh, gusto ko makapagtapos on time!

mahirap... ang hirap talaga, sobrang mahirap ang maging in-love!

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

january 4 blues


si Jolens namomoblema sa boyfriend niyang AWOL
si Ronni naman, nangungulila sa lumisan ng sugar daddy
at ako naman, eto, excited sa muling pagtatagpo naming magkasintahan.

first day palang butas na bulsa ko kaka-photocopy!

first day palang tatlong chapters na babasahin ko!
and what's worse: quiz na sa FRIDAY!

when will i see him kaya... hekhekhekhek... (~~,)

fave expression


1. the expression Pocholo used after opening his Christmas gift from Auntie Emma.
2. the expreesion everyone blurted out after their names were called by Santa Zoe.
3. the expression exclaimed by the BINGO blackout winners! isa ako dun!!!


a simple, short word;
universally used to express joy and happiness.
the only word I can say
after that wonderful New Year day.